Butterflies

Trying to get the nursery proper and all of blooming plants—bright colors, heady smells, early summer at its best—Mona almost walked past his table. It was one those fold-up numbers with foldout legs. Portable. Impermanent. The young man standing behind table dressed in a gray plaid shirt tucked into neatly ironed chinos, hair cut but not too short or neat.Maybe I should stop see what he's about? After all, Mona gregarious mood. Today she free from thinking about needed be done next. Without speaking saying word anyone anything, celebrated this moment herself.The day exquisite. Early best. Full, round sunshine. Clear skies. could hear birds singing trees, celebrating season. But couldn't help wonder whether actually What were they saying, if privy bird language? Slowing her step, stopped front Their eyes met. They both smiled. He opened mouth, ready for customer. And decided listen spiel. Soon enough, she'd back following path that led rows plants stretching just around corner.Droplets sweat on lip, he seemed genuinely convinced promoting felt-tip sign he'd made attract customers. “You'll never believe what's these bags.” held up waxed-paper bag holding something looked like beginning five fingers. “I'd show you . ”Mona wanted even though sun beggaring back, begging find someplace cool, way. set curious paraphernalia—collapsible net tubes used who-knows-what, bags, money box, always money. Her sense what-might-happen-next aroused.“These are cocoons, growing every day. need do is wait ten days.” half-formed then it down untied string opening full length. reminded Slinky except didn't slink. pop-up contraption could, untied, change disc four-inch-tall basket.“Then put tube. Fasten top safety pin I've included. They're hungry little buggers, they'll eat sustenance. they're secure inside net, leave them alone seven days. You'll surprised, amazed, over-the-moon happens, remember take butterflies out before their wings have dried. Read instructions. good.”“Butterflies?” said. “These will really butterflies?” own kitchen. Some half-remembered leftover. mood believe. She purse, took asking price twenty dollars, handed him.“You won't sorry,” said, giving tied tube exchange—her kit possibility.She carefully which close, worried might suffocated process. “Good luck more customers.”She continued along aisles flowers soon-to-be felt lighter somehow. skipping, quite. That ones who bend pretzels. Sunshine. Flowers. Gardeners. smell hundreds promises.Probably scam, nice told herself. Could Saturday morning baloney, don't care. Then new different garden. So many plants. tiny bodies grew sunlight water. It's miracle, thought. way things start seed. seed opens miracle stem winding soil.I'm lucky alive such as this, herself signs read Dahlias, Marigolds, Shasta Daisies. than perfect it's hot. How amazing live four seasons after my childhood two, barely. Mostly hot cold few months. loved being midst buds blossoms, some kind heaven described by mere words.She thought husband, Stefan, today, walking having become hard him. specimen, an athlete, now barely walk. hurt head think him, changes had accept period time. Not fair. So, turned thoughts other things.The busting seams day—everyone wanting entertained showy strut. finally picked two geraniums, waited long line pay pittance, satisfied garden possibilities instead only small moment. smells. greenery. rich soil. people shorts, cutoffs, overalls. endless promise growth her. been impulsive, quick right space parked cars side road. here possibility geraniums hand, unplanned hours. day!There cage above cashier, shifting claws, feet, whatever were. Something white parrot topknot, name, though, did matter? skittering across rod much squawks. rather handsome bird. Maybe keeper night, probably covered sheet blanket then. come cage? Was raised farm caught wilds? was, hanging counter, someone's pet, hoped. A pet someone loved, cared for, after.A cage. That's where Stefan was. In wasn't fair given (by whom, she'll know answer) narrow range operation, limited movements, trouble walking. His neuromuscular disease cruel child movement, strength because able body, King Gym, even. athletic body: power legs when bicycled miles arms played tennis, football, basketball. Exquisite watch, seen years scuffling walk, bent unyielding body. must remember. must. would unfair forget.But enough cages became first line. retrieved wallet bill, purse still open. “Thank you, thank you,” cashier next person attention. strolled path, butterfly once again. talking else, so there nothing say, ask him “Butterflies? Really?” waxed sat kitchen away less-lighted corners, theory fact, cocoons kept longer sticky substance sides diminishing size. Something, somebody, eating so-called food left bag, maybe sucking up, osmosis, something. figure out. attention, busy attending breakfast dinner keeping smells ideas meal. exotic dessert.She say bags away—the bag. mention insignificant. When contrasted diminishment, unimportant. An afterthought. impulse thrown amount anything. idea fluff counter. Detritis. Instead, make Stefan's life fulfilling lost.Stefan. dreamed lift sky fly anywhere wished. world lovely place no troubles, worries. wished everything walk hike, bike, swallow outdoors, autumn leaves, spring green, paths places. desired travel world, done, difficult negotiate bathroom.“Eggs again,” said served breakfast. “Sorry boring, hey, protein. Necessary stuff.”“No worries,” hands receive plate reclining chair morning. pressed button bring himself sitting position. mechanical, laid grab stand. big, comfortable, brown velour chair, better bulky, hulky, bombshell chairs they'd Why, wondered store, manufacturers monstrous things? possibly thinking?“What we today?” asked, very knew it. go another ride, gone rides drives, worthwhile, excuse house. movie theaters, option, dangerous places Covid pandemic, early, theaters open beat crowds. crowds anymore. know.“I run errands,” recliner, reassuring handles walker talked. There times out, errands keep sanity, running beside now, remembered stand straight important maintain posture between them. order. Uprightness. encouraged upright possible often comma walker. rules, how exactly felt. facing physical barriers? sure lines caregiver receiver ended began. suspected overly attentive.“Maybe can wing man. Sound exciting?”“Not much,” checking TV remote resting arm chair. He's watch soon clear breakfast, “I'll hang until back.”“I'll quickly shouldn't long. You you'll okay?”“I'll here.”“You sure?”Her hesitancy stemmed incident fallen. One black night. dark, dark memory. Neither happened, half asleep, fuzzy head, tried bathroom. He'd taken blind fall onto stone tiles bathroom floor. Luckily, guest house helped bed, damage: jagged skin-splits arm, deep cuts, lots blood, necessity stitches hand thumb joins edge bed while cleaned, medicated, wrapped wounds, blood leaking comforter, leaving traces event behind. proficient, efficient, sufficient—all things, sum take.His skin thin, susceptible tearing, pulling apart, body cocoon getting close end. grows paper-thin walls collapse. Except doesn't deteriorate nothing. becomes butterfly. flies. Away. Up air. catches shades light finds light. Metamorphosis. wondering. does old emerge cocoon, thin-walled skin, shrinking away? spirit man, woman, flies husk dries blown wind. At end days, transferred paper First, popped four-inch blue bottom, zipper. Though several times, however, without tearing paper. If tore it, harm cocoons. good idea. placed instead, floor tube, do. zipped closed. This bad call, whole endeavor brightest ever anyway, listening impermanent impulsive nursery. Listening promises happen followed Did work anyway? Seven days later, saw shadows one-winged shapes emerging glued together, seemed. instructions let dry unzipping sodden unstuck, turn fly.“Hey, Stefan. I'm Can it?”“Is your wild, off-the-wall projects?” flipping channels remote. “You're trying something, aren't you?”“Well, why not?” answered “You tell worth trouble, you?”“No, can't,” said.There thick pause room, question Mona's projects unanswered. wouldn't regard, afraid ask. parade going quiet head. wondering thinking, tired be. interested doing not.But time, hell future. dollars time around? cocoons? height traveled stairs, attempt stairs.“Do want gym peeling Granny Smith apples cobbler recipe cookbook usually reliable. Sometimes liked treadmill pedal stationary bike shape, paid day, reacting any demand. piper pay, seemed, came condition.“Sure,” “I feel pretty today. Give me hour.“You got it.” give prepared oven. bake back.Stefan shuffled bedroom, found shorts them, most went laundry room stepped large pair tennis shoes loosely step bending over.“Let's go,” finishing crumble crust cobbler, complicated imagined.“I'm coming,” knowing couple minutes finish project. along.” waiting car emerged driveway, matter Gone men lusted svelte shape lycra.The second level rec center. stairs elevator. met top, “Bon voyage,” respective spots gym. nine-times-makes-a-mile track, sit-ups, weightlifting machines treadmill, safe him—King Gym—and rode bike. Rare moments faring, exercise, too. also off, lighten load unwelcome burden. doing, treat normal.The balance isn't easy determine, track lane provided walkers. Too much, little. Interested. Disinterested. On spot. Off mark.The worked mats, lifting lying position floor, balancing Bosu balls, wearing elastic bands ankles sideways. woman swinging barbells overhead, puffing between, looking heavier lift. boxing corner, punching steadily, moving upper double-ended dancing feet. All engaged flow strengthening themselves, fine-tuning themselves. enjoyed doing.So industry ninth last lap. bench Leave alone, savored space, minutes. Father's Day manufactured fathers well mothers, commercial enterprise, nonetheless, father. remembered, gifts, really. materialistic noticed.Mona slippers, trip therefore please, that, Oh well, thought, least father, bottom line.While kitchen, all. They'd unzip deck, shining warmly knees tan. Tan nature spotty unpredictable mark rarely wore shorts.Mona deck bag? There's supposed there.” She'd asked casually, expect, flight commonplace backyard air.“Sure,” sudden coming usual. unzipped movement netting. Suddenly, warning, emerged. fluttered air deck. “Painted Lady. cocoons,” condition greater words spoken. thing beauty. Black pink, slanted design wings. dropped mouths flight. watched flutter through air, scattering directions. As attached eyes, flew.The landed geranium bought nursery, flitted leaf, stayed briefest moments. each other, surprise. spoken, pass flicker smile face.“And Day,” unusually animated. sank kinship home born. babies, donation great outdoors. sun, warmth, much.